We will look at the reputation of our woman of Proverbs and how it impacts her husband. Her heart is for her husband and she does him good.
I was planning on going through this section verse by verse as we have done with most of the other sections of the bible. But after reading through the full section, I was inspired to group the verses into related topics. I want to start at the beginning with her; her reputation and how it impacts her husband.
This woman didn’t just happen to turn out after her marriage. She was a woman of character long before she became engaged. She learned the skills we will see later from her mother and other women in her life. She learned of God and what is expected of a woman in her culture. She is warm, open, and caring from her youth. And she has kept herself pure for her husband.
When she walks through her town tongues do not wag in gossip. They praise her instead. They praise her for her kind heart and good character. Her character spills over onto her husband and children. They feel proud when her name is mentioned as there are not secrets to hide from. Her husband is praised for the works that come out of his home, how supportive his wife is and how obedient his children are. Even the clothes he wears while sitting at the gate speak of her love for her husband. His clothes are always clean, fit well, and without tears.
As head of the home, his wife’s behavior reflects on him. If she were disruptive or disobedient the blame and shame would fall on him. She cares about his position and how he is viewed so, she conducts herself with him in mind. She stays within the boundaries set by her society for a woman while also enriching her family and their position.
Her works ARE seen by those around. She does not act in secret. And the works she does are a testament to her husband and elevate him in the eyes of others. She is not the only reason he sits among the elders at the gate but her actions do not detract from his accomplishments and character that got him this place of importance.
They are a lovely couple and compliment each other well. Both have learned well the lessons of God from their youth. Their characters are above reproach. Tomorrow we will see the works she does as a result of her character.
While thinking about our wife of excellence I was brought back to my own life. My character today is not the same as it was when I was young or even when I was a young wife. One thing that time has taught me is how to tame my temper. My family can attest to the fact that I lacked control in that area. I wanted to say there weren’t a lot of physical altercations as a result of my temper but the Spirit brought a few to my memory. Pushing my brother, who fell through the window, because he wouldn’t help clean our room. Scratches on my sister’s boyfriends’ arms or faces when they got fresh with her. MANY physical shoving matches with my brother when our parents were gone. Little things like that. MANY MORE of my temper’s rises to the surface were marred by verbal outbursts. Not foul language but raised voices and adamant arguments. I was a force to be reconned with at times.
This, however, was not the totality of my character. I was loving, loyal, kind, and caring when my temper wasn’t creating a problem. As my temper faded away (or was tamed) these other characteristics gained a stronger hold in my life. I have known of God for as long as I can remember and our personal relationship has deepened with the passing of time too. My husband today is praised by his friends for my character. But would they praise me if they had known me in my youth?
So, my question is, what was our ‘wife of excellence’ really like as a child? Did she always obey her mother the first time? Did she want to learn the ways of a good wife; cooking, cleaning, sewing…? Or did she play games with the boys and get dirty? Did she ever pick us a rock and throw it in anger?
Did she become this excellent woman through twists, turns, starts and restarts? Or was she born with the temperament of one suited to the role she would one day take on? Did she struggle to get to her pinnacle or was it an easy walk? A natural born woman or a reformed tomboy? And can a reformed tomboy ever reach her status? This reformed tomboy would honestly like to know.
Father God, thank You for never giving up on me! Even when I have WELL EARNED the title of Katy Kaboom, You still called me Your child. YOU worked on my heart. You molded it and shaped it. You scraped away the impurities that were spoiling the form You were making. I know I still have a LONG way to go before ever coming close to the woman described here but I’m willing to work with You and not resist as You continue working in my life. Let’s see where we go from here. I’m ready Father.