Proverbs 18:23-19:4 Bad Times
Solomon highlights how bad times affect a man. The one with much money has many friends. They both leave together.
My bible helps labels this group of scriptures as ones regarding “misfortune from various angles.” I don’t know if I would have seen that if it were not for them directing how I looked at these proverbs. I wonder how I would have read them if I hadn’t read my bible helps first. Let’s see where the Spirit takes us. His path is ALWAYS better than relying on someone else’s.
In the first verse we see how someone in need has to beg for what he wants while the rich person doesn’t care how he treats others. Have you ever heard the saying, “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar”? When you want something you are more likely to get it if your requests are made with humility and kind words. Flattering words can even take you farther at times. Those who think they have no need of anything don’t care how they treat people. But we ALL have some kind of need, most of which money can’t buy.
The next verse reminds me of the prodigal son’s experience. A man with lots of money who is willing to spend it on his friends has a LOT of ‘friends’. But when the money runs out so do his ‘friends’. TRUE friends are with you for more than what you can give them. A good friendship is built on hearts, not on things. Friends help one another, build one another up, and stay with you during fat and lean times.
The friend who sticks closer than a brother is certainly referring to our relationship with Jesus. He NEVER leaves us. He NEVER says, “What have you done for Me lately?” Nothing can separate us from our God. And SOMETIMES you find an earthly friend who is faithful like Him. Blessed is the man that finds such a friend.
Our next verse looks at the heart of the person, not their pocketbook. Poor or rich, when you walk with integrity you are FAR ahead of the one who is crooked. I think the poor man is singled out here because it relates back to verse 23. If a poor person has to resort to trickery through flattering words then he is better off not going after what is motivating him.
There was a family in my area of the world that made the news AND wound up effecting laws a few years ago. It was a man, his wife, and their small child. They would walk the streets of a neighboring town begging people for money. They stories they shared tore at the hearts of the people. Even the mayor of that town gave to them at least once. Then they came across someone who ‘blew the lid off’ their lives. I don’t know if they knew this person was interviewing them for a story or if they thought they were talking to a like-minded person, but what they said opened some eyes and raised hackles on the back of the mayor.
In the ‘interview’ they stated that they were very happy going up to people and begging from them. They bragged that they could make more in a day begging than most people made working full time. I believe they stated they could bring in $1,000 a day this way. They stated that they slept in the best hotels every night this way and had no wants. Their picture was even posted with the article so the people could identify this crooked couple when they saw them.
After hearing this story, the mayor quickly brought new legislation to her city which made begging a criminal offense. Her initiative spread to nearby cities, including mine. Now there are signs posted at freeway exits that read “Passing articles from your car to pedestrians is a violation.” I don’t know what became of the couple who was interviewed but their actions impacted everyone else who waits with hand out. Some of those people really needed the help while others didn’t. Now every time I pass someone begging on the street I wonder about their true situation.
Our next verse could very easily relate back to that same story. Unbridled desire makes some do things that get them into hot water instead of meeting their desire. Have you ever wanted something so badly that you lost sight of everything else? Chasing after this one desire can take you on the wrong path; even make you miss GREAT opportunities in your pursuit.
I would love to give you a story relating to this, but I can’t. I have had times where I wanted something with all my heart and didn’t get it. I have had times when I got what I thought I wanted, but it disappointed me instead. I’ve had times where I pursued something with all I had and God opened doors along the way. And I’ve seen some of what I pursued so hard let me down for a time. But because I am not God, I can’t point out the other opportunities I missed along the way. Making one choice over another changed my life and I don’t know where I would be if I had made a different choice. I DO have choices I regret making but they can’t be undone. Only surrendered to Him and redeemed or turned into good lessons. Maybe that will be one of my ‘bench questions’ for Jesus. “What could have been?” I pray the ‘was’ is MUCH BETTER than the ‘wasn’t’.
Now THIS verse sounds VERY familiar! I don’t know if I’ve lived any of these circumstances because when my “folly” brings me into a mess I KNOW right where the blame lies. ON ME. God didn’t do it to me, I did. But I’ve heard stories of people doing stupid things and then blaming God for the outcome. I have a family member who lost a child due to stupid choices. They blame EVERYONE except themselves. THEY allowed the children to be taken to a park BY THE RIVER just before dark. THEY decided to stay and visit with their friends instead of supervising their children. THEY knew their children couldn’t swim but took no foresight to avail themselves of OFFERED flotation devices. And THEY trusted that the children wouldn’t go too deep in the water. One of those children didn’t return from that outing alive and the other barely made it.
My heart breaks for them and I NEVER want to feel their pain personally but God didn’t do it to them. Poor choices did. Seven years later they still are hurting and will probably for the rest of their lives. I don’t know where the ‘blame’ falls today. I don’t want to truly blame them though. It was a tragic accident with life altering results, but we all do stupid things at times. They just got a MUCH HARDER lesson than any I’ve received.
I feel like this story is heavy enough that I want to end here. But we have one more verse in our reading to go. This verse though says in another way what we already touched on; the prodigal son’s friends. New wealth brings new friends who leave as soon as the money does. This is very sad but true. Ask any lottery winner and they will agree.
Father God, THANK YOU for sticking by me NO MATTER WHAT! You stay when I make stupid choices. You don’t give up on me when ‘friends’ do. You have helped me to tame my tongue, at least to a degree that I don’t pour out ‘vinegar’. You have taught me that I am the maker of my own messes, not You.
Forgive me for ‘blaming’ my family member too. I don’t have a right to judge, only You do. Their lives are not mine and they haven’t learned my lessons that keep me from making more mistakes. THANK YOU for protecting my children from the choices I HAVE made! Not all of them were sound. Sooth their hearts Lord. Don’t let them forget but let the pain drain away. Let them remember the happy smiles when they think about their child instead of his tragic death. Another of those “I wonder what would have happened if I did ____ instead?”
